Any Major Dude With Half A Heart

Who of us has not entertained flights of fancy that placed us on stage at a rock concert, possibly holding an air-guitar (or a tennis racket, if you were rich) or using the imaginary mic as a penis extension? The glamorous life!

But between shows there is the tedium of travel and hotels — realities our flights of fancy don’t take us to. Even the drugs, alcohol and sex with groupies probably become routine. I shall make no inquiries about air-shagging groupies…

I was intrigued to hear Mark Knopfler of Dire Straits talking about touring on the BBC radio programme Desert Island Discs. He recalled that when Dire Straits were a smallish outfit, the band and the roadies etc were like a family, travelling together. He enjoyed those times. But when the band became a big, corporate concern, he wouldn’t even get to know the roadies — to his great regret.

So on this collection of songs, singers and bands tell us about life in the music biz, especially the touring. Bob Seger, Jackson Browne and the Carpenters take a documentary approach to the alienation of touring life, while the Grateful Dead are a bit cryptic as they go on about something something playing in a band. Ace see the break-up with band-members in terms we recognise from songs in the domain of failed romance.

For the most part, our acts are trying to tell us about the downside of fame and of living the musician’s life. And, hey, not everybody can have such fun on the road as Led Zeppelin with their “amusing” degradation of groupies, occasionally involving maritime life.

But making a living as a musician certainly beats being the person who has to remove the chickens’ rectums in the KFC factories (for the manufacture of the nuggets, I assume). So even as our heroes are having a bit of a moan, this mix of songs is tremendous fun — in part because it gives us a glimpse into the lives of those whom we have sought to emulate in front of our mirrors, after a long day of removing poultry arseholes.

There are lots of great songs here, some of them old friends to many of us. The most obscure here is also one of the best: The Man In My Shoes by South African band Stingray. They were a short-lived outfit, active only from 1978 to 1981. The drummer on the featured track, Shaun Wright, lost a leg in a shark attack the following year.

Of course there’ll be a second volume — ABBA, CCR, Mott The Hoople, The Who, The Mamas and The Papas et al still want to put to you their case of musicians’ privations — and AC/DC have to offer a poignant postscript.
As always this mix is timed to fit on a standard CD-R and includes home-airguitared covers, and the above text in a PDF. PW in Comments.

1. AC/DC – It’s A Long Way To The Top (If You Wanna Rock ‘n’ Roll) (1976)
   The Band Life: On the way to the top, you get ripped-off, underpaid, beat-up and stoned
2. Grand Funk Railroad – We’re An American Band (1973)
   The Band Life: When this band comes to your town, they’ll help you party it down
3. David Bowie – Ziggy Stardust (1972)
   The Band Life: Should we crush the star’s hands?
4. Mott The Hoople – The Saturday Gigs (1974)
   The Band Life: Chelsea groupies are the best company
5. Stingray – The Man In My Shoes (1979)
   The Band Life: Living fast and high never did no good
6. Bruce Springsteen & The E Street Band – Tenth Avenue Freeze-Out (live) (1984)
   The Band Life: The founding tale of the E Street Band
7. Little River Band – Home On Monday (1977)
   The Band Life: Long-distance telephone call from the Hilton in Las Vegas
8. Joe Walsh – Life’s Been Good (1978)
   The Band Life: Because modesty is overrated
9. Ace – How Long (1974)
   The Band Life: Betrayal by band mates!
10. Jackson Browne – The Load Out (1977)
    The Band Life: There’s the downtime between gigs
11. The Rolling Stones – Torn And Frayed (1972)
    The Band Life: Just as long as the guitar plays, all’s okay
12. Bob Seger & The Silver Bullet Band – Turn The Page (Live) (1976)
    The Band Life: Riding 16 hours to the next gig and there’s nothing to do
13. Carpenters – Road One (1972)
    The Band Life: The endless cycle of crowds and all the temporary places can get to you
14. Elton John – Holiday Inn (1971)
    The Band Life: Boredom’s a pastime that one soon acquired
15. The Byrds – So You Want To Be A Rock ‘n’ Roll Star (1967)
    The Band Life: Old folkies rail against manufactured pop bands (guess whom they are spoofing)
16. Grateful Dead – Playing In The Band (1971)
    The Band Life: Who knows what the fuck they’re on, or on about?
17. Jeff Tweedy – The Ballad Of The Opening Band (2013)
    The Band Life: You were gonna be a singer on the hit parade, but…
18. Barenaked Ladies – Hello City (1992)
    The Band Life: The boys don’t like their gig much
19. Drive-By Truckers – Road Cases (2001)
    The Band Life: Instrument cases as a metaphor for the fleeting nature of fame
20. They Might Be Giants – The End Of The Tour (1994)
    The Band Life: The tour ends, popularity ends, relationships end, life ends…

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