Any Major Dude With Half A Heart

Any major health update: recently I’ve been diagnosed with diabetes, so with this collection of songs about sugar, honey, candy and sweet things I’m saying goodbye to sugar, honey, candy and sweet things.

Before you make funeral arrangements for me, however, be reassured that my diabetes is of the more managable Type 2. I’m responding well to medication, and my healthier lifestyle is helping shed a few excess pounds (not that I had been struggling with it, but my body was taking on a decidedly middle-age form). So while I’m not exactly thrilled about the diagnosis — this shit can kill you, as it did one of my siblings — I’m rather upbeat about how this condition has forced me to adapt my diet and exercise regimen, to good effect. Plus, my severe reduction on beer and wine consumption is helping keep the bar fridge filled. And before you ask, I take my coffee without sugar.

The songs here may talk about sugar, honey, candy and sweet things, but in most of them, these things are euphemisms, usually for sex or romance or drugs — even my new national anthem, Sugar Free. In fact, if Sammy Davis’ Candy Man isn’t about drugs — and the jury is out on that — the most innocent metaphor here is the spoonful of sugar that helps the medicine go down. When I asked my doctor if I should take a spoonful of sugar with my diabetes medicine, she humourlessly replied: “No”. Or maybe she laughed; who knows what goes on behind those Covid masks?So here are 24 sweet songs, timed to fit on a standard CD-R with home-xylotoled covers. PW in comments.

1. The Archies – Sugar Sugar (1969)
2. Four Tops – I Can’t Help Myself (Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch) (1965)
3. The Searchers – Sweets For My Sweet (1963)
4. The Strangeloves – I Want Candy (1965)
5. Brian Poole & The Tremeloes – Candy Man (1964)
6. Rodriguez – Sugar Man (1970)
7. Ernie Hines – Sugar Plum (Gimme Some) (1972)
8. Sugar Billy – Sugar Pie (1975)
9. Vivian Reed – Brown Sugar (1976)
10. Luther Vandross – Sugar And Spice (1981)
11. Juicy – Sugar Free (1985)
12. Don Downing – Sugar & Spice (1978)
13. Stevie Wonder – Sugar (1970)
14. The Beach Boys – Wild Honey (1967)
15. Nancy Sinatra – Sugar Town (1966)
16. Lynsey De Paul – Sugar Me (1972)
17. The Jesus & Mary Chain – Just Like Honey (1985)
18. Joseph Arthur – Honey And The Moon (2002)
19. Brandi Carlile – Sugartooth (2018)
20. Leonard Nimoy – Cotton Candy (1968)
21. Nina Simone – I Want A Little Sugar In My Bowl (1967)
22. The Astors – Candy (1965)
23. Sammy Davis Jr. – The Candy Man (1971)
24. Julie Andrews – A Spoonful Of Sugar (1964)

Plus a bunch of sweet bonus tracks by acts like Sam Cooke, The Cure, Mungo Jerry, David Ruffin and more…

GET IT!

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